My father, General Chick Cleveland, passed away in May 2021 at the age of 93. He gave me some great advice over those years, and I am sharing some of it here on my blog in small doses. I hope it means as much to you as it does to me!
Mainstream values are good – I had lots of notions of individualism bordering on rebellion when I was younger. There was a time when I hung out with friends who dyed their hair green and pink, wore tattered clothes, boys wore makeup, and girls wore grunge. It was freeing in a way because it was so different from my conservative lifestyle at home. The ideal of individual expression was very appealing, especially when it flew so flagrantly in the face of the status quo. My father had a different take on it. “It seems like your friends just want to shock people. They are looking for attention, not for anything positive they are contributing to society, but just for their appearance. What’s the value in that?” He continued, “The reason society, American society, progresses is because of the basis it has in the Judeo-Christian value system.” Now Daddy was never a religious man. When questioned, he would say he was agnostic, but he put great stock in the value system developed on biblical mores. Individual expression is well and good, but a great society gets ahead when it works for the common good, not when it works for the individual.
Help others; give freely – Generosity of life and spirit is what makes life worth living. When you can give to others, you are truly receiving more. It feels good to share. If it doesn’t, you’re not doing it right.
Life is good; be positive – There are many more good things in the world than bad. Just look for them. If you stop looking for the negative, you might start seeing the positive. Even simple things are good, like someone’s smile, the love of a pet, witnessing a good deed. Be watchful for these things.
People are good; believe the best – Some people are boobs. Most are not. When you start believing people are bad, everyone looks bad. Stop that. Start believing most people want the best. Sure, people will take the easiest route to get something; it’s human nature. That doesn’t necessarily make them bad.
Support the underdog – The underdogs in this world are the brave and the untested. They pit themselves against champions and dare to win, taunting victory. They epitomize courage and boldness. And they deserve a cheerleader!
Let the other person have the bigger piece; always ask if anyone else wants the last bite – This is common courtesy. Don’t be a hog.
Mind your manners – Always say “please,” “thank you,” “after you.” Let others have the first piece and the last piece. It is what drives a civilized world.
Always pitch in and help – We are a community and can do so much more together than alone. When you see someone burdened with a task, pick up some of the slack, at home, at work, at school, wherever. It builds rapport and a sense of accomplishment.
Practice, practice, practice – The only way to master a skill is to practice it relentlessly. If you don’t practice, you will be a poor performer. Practice everything you want to excel at, from communication to your backhand.
Keep yourself healthy – Your body has to last your whole lifetime. Take care of your teeth!
Family is the most important thing in life, the ones you support, the ones who support you – Take care of them and treat them well. You will need them one day!